Are Your Money Stories Fish Stories? With Dr. Joe

In this episode, I’m ecstatic to have Dr. Joe, a money EQ specialist, with us to talk about money.

Let’s get to learn more about him, what he does, and tips that will help us navigate through our money stories.

Dr. Joe’s Quick Background Story

It all started back in 2009. Dr. Joe’is wife also experienced a scary situation twice in just six weeks at work which led to some mental health issues. At the same time, he felt that he’s also due for a change in his long-term job.

So from Utah, the pair moved to Maryland where he got a job. They were able to get great help for his wife’s mental health issues and led toward her journey to recovery. Dr. Joe noticed that the cost of living is different between Utah and Maryland. He went from making $55,000 a year in Utah into $82,500 a year in Maryland. On the flip side, her wife’s income went away.

As a result, he worked really hard to increase his income. Unfortunately, there was a time when he couldn’t pay his bills anymore- even if he’s earning $100,000 - as they incurred out-of-pocket costs for her wife’s mental health and the family’s healthcare.

Through such experience, Dr. Joe is trying to teach people on the EQ side of money. How will we be able to take these things that happened in our lives with making our relationship with money powerful? We live so transactionally that we forget about the emotional side of what's happening through this process.

Most People are Fearful of Money in a Mental Health Standpoint

As per Dr. Joe, most of his clients are fearful and often turn their money stories to fish stories - meaning, the experience they had is not really that impactful but since it’s unknown, we talk about it more and more and it grows into something that leads us to just forget about it and continue doing what we’ve been doing.

Upbringing also plays an important role. Most of the things we learn about money are often learned when we were younger kids. At this age, kids, who are just yet to experience money, think that parents know everything because they’re older. Unfortunately, in our minds, that money stuff becomes the truth, growing up.

Stay Curious, Not Judgemental

In this situation, Dr. Joe’s advice is to always stay curious. If we can stay curious and not set in our ways, then we can start questioning ourselves if there could be a different way - not better, not best, just different. Maybe we’d like this different way because it's more part of us versus something that somebody just gave to us. As a result, we can be more us and show up in the world where we want to show up, instead of following the rules set up by other people.

Let me share a quote from Ted Lasso, “Stay curious, not judgemental”, as this is also what Dr. Joe is spreading. We shouldn’t label anything as good or bad because that’s not reality. “It’s just really giving people a different perspective,” as Dr. Joe says.

The MERIT Framework

When looking at a holistic approach, money is actually 5 of the resources that Dr. Joe talks about in his consulting work. It’s part of the framework:

M - Money

E - Energy

R - Relationships

I - Ideas

T - Time

And these are all intertwined. As we start solving for one resource, then we are actually starting to solve for more resources in our lives. We can then start to balance our life a lot more.

Listen to the full podcast episode to learn more about the framework and Dr. Joe’s nuggets of money advice!